Friday, June 4, 2010


I can't believe that you are gone 1 year already and only. I still miss you so much. I found the perfect rose bush. It is a hybrid and it is called "Apricot Candy" I bought it about 2 weeks ago. It started blooming within a few days. Beautiful salmon color. After the blooms opened up a bit, they turned peach. Within a few days the blooms turned pink. So at one time I had 4 different colors on the same bush. The bush is like you - very special.

Today was the day that I planted the bush into the final place. In the corner of the patio. I had lots of potting soil, fertilizer and your ashes. Tony dug a hole and after Pastor Troy got here, we prayed for you and I planted the bush. I cried - but I think, they were good tears. I miss you like crazy but I know that you are now much better off than you were before here on earth.

It was a hard month for me - could you believe, I hardly could bring myself to pick up the crochet hook? My heart just wasn't in it. It seems like the service today gave me some kind of closure and after my 2-hour nap I picked up the hook and made a leg warmer. i am way behind (MY) schedule with them. I hope to be able to mail them latest by the middle of the month. Bless Kathy for being so patient. It would be wonderful to meet her - which is difficult, since she lives in Canada and I am in Utah - Oh well. I haven't heard back yet if she received the sample hat.

I received a letter from Dean accusing me of scheduling the memorial service for the same time he had visiting. I am floored and very hurt that he thinks I would be capable of that. I wrote him a letter and tore it up. All my anger was in that letter. I wrote him a second letter and that is the one that will go out to him. He is not going to like it - too bad. I read the letter (the one he wrote to me) to Janean and she was with him this morning and kicked him a few times. Until further notice I won't go out visiting him anymore. That letter was disrespectful to me and your memory. He has nobody but himself to blame for the consequences.

In all this Tony has been my rock. Thank you so much sweetheart for asking him to stay on after you leave.

I will try to put a picture of the rose bush in here if I can figure out how to do that. Thanks Bev for the help with posting the picture.

Sweetheart, I love you so very much and am waiting for the day when we are together again (Not for a long time though - I am way too busy here)


SandieP said...

I find it hard to believe it's been a year since your dear husband passed on to glory. I'm sure the time has been difficult for you, Chris, but you have persevered as he would have wanted you to. Thinking of you often!

bevq said...

What a gorgeous rose bush!

HilsGal said...

Thank you Sandie - yes, it is hard to believe. I can feel him cheering me on. As long as we don't stop talking and thinking about a person, they are not gone, right? That would mean, he is with me for all times.

HilsGal said...

Thank you Bev - in the meantime I had to trim all the flowers but one. They were falling apart. But I know, there will be many many more flowers.