OUCH

I am a little behind in posting. Funny thing happened: The first SS arrived after about 1 week, but the death benefit didn't. I called and was told - "Sorry, it got stuck at the payment center" - no problem. I was promised that it would go out the following week. It didn't. I received a letter telling me that they are keeping the benefit against the overpayment and are calling it good. I objected, because I figure they had 7 years to collect. If they insist, I will give in - but until then????

Sweetheart, do you remember the group "Mercy Me? NO? - How about the song "I can only imagine" - Thought that might ring a bell. Anyway, they were at the state fair on September 17. The tickets were not outrages so we went. It was very loud and the "last song" they did was "I can only imagine" - and the waterworks started. They got a standing ovation and did about 3 more songs. We enjoyed it. With your sensitive hearing, you wouldn't have I am sorry to say.

This past Monday I went to WinCo to do some shopping. I slipped on a grape and found out that the floor is hard, very hard. It took me about 10 - 15 minutes to be able to get up. They got me an electric wheelchair to be able to move. I never thought, I would use something like that. They took an accident report. When I got off the wheelchair to get into the car, I was feeling quite confident that I could walk without help - NOT. After about 3 - 4 steps, I was down again. Almost caused Tony a heart attack. Once home, he cancelled school for the evening to stay home and be there for me. I objected - but was told "Deal with it" - Yesterday I walked around with your walker. I am happy that I had kept it. After Tony got home I tried his cane, having him close by in case I need ed help. It worked very well. I am not about to try to walk without it though. I am very careful. I am taking it easy and doing some light exercises.

I will sit outside a bit later - it is wonderful out there. Your rosebush is now spouting 11 blooms in various stages. I am hoping to take a picture later.

I love you Sweetheart and I miss you so very much.

It's done

It's done, my love. I filed for SS. They will deposit the death benefit in a few days and I will receive my first regular payment in a few weeks. She was very nice, which helped.

She informed me that there was a overpayment for Michael. That was 7 years ago. Remember they didn't recall the April payment (?). We let it sit in the account for a long time waiting for them to retrieve it. They didn't. She told me that they will contact me in about 3+ month and I can make payment arrangements. What puzzles me is this - it was 7 years ago and all this time YOU received SS - why didn't they contact YOU? But that is not here or there - they want their money back. And they will get it - not a problem. We will celebrate receiving the first payment by going to Q4U - one of our favorite BBQ places.

Tony is taking his promise to you (to help me) very serious. I don't think, I could have made it through the last few years without his help and support. Guess what - he is starting school on Monday. Massage Therapist. We always said that he is good at it. He is looking forward to it. I am happy for him.

Monday this week we went to Wendover, Montego Bay (I had a free room) We got there early, like we always do. We were told to come back at 3 o'clock since the room wasn't done. Well, check-in time is 3PM. Not a problem. We checked back at 3 and the room was still not done. At 330 still not done. I was getting really mad. At 4 o'clock the room was finally done. Once we got to the room, I checked the rules they have posted on the door. Yep, check-in time is 3 PM. After talking to the manager I was informed that since I requested a room close to the elevator, those were the last rooms to be done. I could have had a room in the new section (about 1 mile away) When we checked out, they received a not very nice report. It is unacceptable to make us wait for a whole hour.

On a nicer note - I took all the money back home with me and Tony almost doubled the money he brought - LOL. We have already started saving coins and 1-Dollar bills for the next time.

Your rosebush is growing very nice. The roses are a bit bigger and they are starting to be peach. This confirms my theory that the bush is still settling.

My love, filing for SS was another little piece of closure. It is a long process. I am still talking to you every night, telling you about my day. It's not like you don't know about it anyway. But I miss talking to you. I miss you so much in every aspect. But I also know, that you are now with Jesus and without pain, the wheelchair and oxygen. The knowledge of that makes it easier for me to deal with all this.

I love you sweetheart.

FINALLY

Hi Sweetheart - I finally did it. I called Social Security to claim your Social Security and your death benefit. I spoke to a lady in New Mexico. She was very nice. She set up the appointment for August 05 - I was doing just fine until she read back all the info to me and said that as reason for the appointment she put down widow pension. That's when I almost lost it. She was very understanding.

In today's mail YOU received an invitation for a 3-night stay at the Peppermill Reno, since you are such a loyal customer. Hmmm - care to explain that one?? I called them and spoke to them about that there is NO way that you are a loyal customer there. He apologized many times. The poor guy was so embarrassed, it was funny.

I haven't heard from my customer yet. The packages were delivered on Saturday, 07/17. Since it went to her cottage, she probably hasn't been there. I will send her a note and find out.

I am contemplating making things for my Etsy store again, but am not sure about that yet. I will pray about it a bit more.

Your rosebush is doing well, except the roses are small and yellow. I think that might be, because the bush is still settling.

I received a letter from David asking yet another favor. He asked for a loan of $30 - if he keeps his nose clean, he might be transferred back to Draper the end of October, beginning of November.

I received another letter from Dean. He is wondering how long it will take until I forgive him and come back out to see him. He still thinks, I accused him unjust. NO sign of an apology, because he doesn't think he did anything wrong. He thinks that he can say anything he wants but if I call him on it, I am the one in the wrong. That's not how it works. It's going to be a while until I go out to visit again. Do you remember Anderson, the nice one? He told Janean to make sure and tell me HI and he misses me. LOL. But not as much as I miss you. Be well my love.

Stuff

On July 04 we had a BBQ and I invited Donna and Jackie - it was very nice.

On Monday, after coming out of the Dollar Tree, my car sounded really funny and the "service engine soon" light came on. It felt like I was driving over cobblestone, except there was no cobblestone. I didn't like the way it sounded so I decided to bring it right away to the Back Shop. I had totally forgotten that since Sunday was a holiday, a lot of businesses were closed on Monday. Greg was one of them. GGGRRR. I put my emergency lights on and drove very slowly home. Next morning I called Greg and told him that the car was being funny. He offered to come and pick it up - good, because I wasn't going to drive it anywhere. He called me later that evening and told me what's wrong with it. He could have been speaking greek for all I understood. He told me it would be about $1,000 - THAT I understood. Oh well, it needed to be done. He brought the car back on Thursday with the invoice and told me to pay whenever I am back in that neighborhood. My car looks like it is brand new. He cleaned it inside and out - WOW.

On Monday evening Janean was coming over and since I wan't driving anywhere, I asked her if she could please stop by Market Fresh (used to be Albertson) to pick up some chicken for me. It is tradition that we have chicken on Monday - LOL. She did and delivered the chicken. What a friend.

I received another letter from Dean. He feels like I ripped into him totally unjust. I don't think so. As of right now, I haven't answered his letter, talked to him on the phone nor have I been out to see him. I am still very upset with him and in my opinion, rightfully so. Sweetheart, I could really use your interference here. You were the calming influence in my life and you would have set him straight as you did before.

I miss you so much. It is getting easier though. Your rosebush is growing nicely and there are a few buds on. It is hotter than all get-out though. This is a weather where we both would stay in. I even gave in and turned on the AC and you know how much I hate the AC, but right now it is still in the high 80s. Today we had about 95. I sat outside until it hit 80 and then I fled inside - LOL

Guess what, I finished the order for Kathy and it is sitting here waiting to be shipped. I notified her and am just waiting for the money to get here. She liked the sample hat I sent and needs to decide on the colors. In the meantime I am crocheting and knitting for charity.

Be well my love. I love you very much.

Game Night?

Last Friday we had a Game Night scheduled at church. I had the snack ready and was looking forward to it.

My favorite Radio station (KDYL) was giving away Beach Boy concert tickets - it was a sold out concert. You had to call in and be caller # 10 when they played the song: "Salt Lake City" The concert was at the Peppermill Concert Hall Friday Night. Guess what, I won a set of tickets, sooo instead of going to the game night, I went to the concert. WOW - this was the first time I was in that concert hall. There is NO bad seat in the entire house - mind you some are better than others, like the ones right in front of the stage. We had section C row 14 - - for free tickets, not bad. The concert was totally awesome. They didn't take a break at all. The concert was 2 hours long. The Beach Boys came on stage blazing and left 2 hours later the same way. We were singing and dancing most of the concert. My voice was still a little bit rough the next day.

You, my love wouldn't have enjoyed it though - it was a bit (a lot) noisy, but it was FUN. We didn't even go into the casino afterwards. We drove straight home. What a concert. There are only 2 of the original Beach Boys left.

Symphony

Tonight was the season finale of the West Valley Symphony - it was the first time that we went since you left. You would have enjoyed it. Show tunes. WOW They got several standing ovations. It is hard to believe that they are not professionals. They are really good and I pictured how much you would have enjoyed it. Love you sweetheart.

ONE YEAR

I can't believe that you are gone 1 year already and only. I still miss you so much. I found the perfect rose bush. It is a hybrid and it is called "Apricot Candy" I bought it about 2 weeks ago. It started blooming within a few days. Beautiful salmon color. After the blooms opened up a bit, they turned peach. Within a few days the blooms turned pink. So at one time I had 4 different colors on the same bush. The bush is like you - very special.

Today was the day that I planted the bush into the final place. In the corner of the patio. I had lots of potting soil, fertilizer and your ashes. Tony dug a hole and after Pastor Troy got here, we prayed for you and I planted the bush. I cried - but I think, they were good tears. I miss you like crazy but I know that you are now much better off than you were before here on earth.

It was a hard month for me - could you believe, I hardly could bring myself to pick up the crochet hook? My heart just wasn't in it. It seems like the service today gave me some kind of closure and after my 2-hour nap I picked up the hook and made a leg warmer. i am way behind (MY) schedule with them. I hope to be able to mail them latest by the middle of the month. Bless Kathy for being so patient. It would be wonderful to meet her - which is difficult, since she lives in Canada and I am in Utah - Oh well. I haven't heard back yet if she received the sample hat.

I received a letter from Dean accusing me of scheduling the memorial service for the same time he had visiting. I am floored and very hurt that he thinks I would be capable of that. I wrote him a letter and tore it up. All my anger was in that letter. I wrote him a second letter and that is the one that will go out to him. He is not going to like it - too bad. I read the letter (the one he wrote to me) to Janean and she was with him this morning and kicked him a few times. Until further notice I won't go out visiting him anymore. That letter was disrespectful to me and your memory. He has nobody but himself to blame for the consequences.

In all this Tony has been my rock. Thank you so much sweetheart for asking him to stay on after you leave.

I will try to put a picture of the rose bush in here if I can figure out how to do that. Thanks Bev for the help with posting the picture.

Sweetheart, I love you so very much and am waiting for the day when we are together again (Not for a long time though - I am way too busy here)