2 years

Where has the time gone? You left your dysfunctional body behind 2 years ago. Actually, it was 2 years ago on Saturday. Only and already 2 years.

Your rose bush is positively exploding with flowers. It looks awesome. Weather permitting I am spending lots of time outside. I took some pictures on Saturday and as soon as I have figured out how to post them, I will do just that.

We had a surprise party for Pastor Troy yesterday - he is turning 40 today. Pastor Chris and Lori did a montage like "It's your life" - that was shown first during the service yesterday morning. It was hilarious. If it would have been possible, Troy would have hidden under the chair. You would have loved it. Troy was such a cute kid. I was not going to participate - but then I thought that you loved Troy - so I went in your honor. I am glad that I did.

Tony is still taking his promise to you very serious. I am glad that he is here. It is not good being totally alone. He started school last week, so we always have dinner around 330PM, which is fine. We are going to the WV fitness center 3 times a week. With school out, we might have to adjust our time a little. This morning there were a whole bunch of teenagers taking possession of the locker rooms. The noise level was incredible. Nothing you could have endured with your sensitive ears.

On Wednesday I am invited to Kelly Benson for a buffet dinner in celebration of all the volunteers as well as the one-year anniversary of them being open. I am looking forward to that. You know that I am making Christmas Presents for all the residents. Last year Pamela Atkinson was there to give out the gifts. After 7 years, I finally met my hero. She is such a wonderful, down-to-earth and nice person. Maybe she'll be there on Wednesday?

My love, it is getting easier living without you - but then again, I am not really without you. You are with me in spirit and watching over me. It's just your body that isn't here anymore. You have now a perfect body, don't need oxygen or a wheelchair anymore. And most important, you are now pain free. I love you and I miss you lots and lots and oodles and gobs.

Proud to be American

Today was the swearing in ceremony. Do you remember Jenny's ceremony? Double that one. We were 193 new citizens. Before we said the pledge of allegiance, the judge allowed the family or whoever wanted to take pictures to come down. I am glad that I had a seat - LOL. Tony came down and took a bunch of pictures. The judge said that he hadn't realized that there were so many photographers there. What did he expect? With 193 people being sworn in? DUH

The whole thing was very emotional and I felt you with me. I had butterflies in my stomach for days prior. Debi was there, so was Glen and Janean,as well as Bri, Bonnie, Larry and Bri's boys. We took some pictures outside and as soon as I have all the pictures together, I will post one here.

I now have officially and legally changed my first name to "Chris" The document was with my citizenship certificate. I am so proud, I could bust.

Tony and I went to the Golden Corral for lunch, which means, I am not making dinner. We are still stuffed. Sandra is taking me to the Red Maple for lunch tomorrow. I called her when I came home and she was so thrilled.

Your rosebush - last count were 26 buds. 2 have no green leaves around the flower anymore and 4 more are on the way. I am so glad that I listened to you when you told me several years ago how to trim the rosebush.

My love, this is the final step for me. Now I am truly and irrevocable HOME. Next Saturday is the 2-year anniversary that you left your dysfunctional body and traded it in for a perfect one. I love you sweetheart and I still miss you terrible.

The Test

Well, my love - yesterday was my citizenship test and I passed with flying colors. The officer was very nice and put me at ease, which helped a lot. You know my warped sense of humor, right? I had him laughing. When I was supposed to read something I told him that I am doing better with pictures, but I will try. LOL. On the "invitation" they listed several documents I MUST bring to the interview. Nothing was asked for. Like the first time we visited Canada, remember? We had all kinds of documents with us and they asked for nothing - but if you don't have anything with you, they want to see everything. Go figure.

I will be sworn in June or July. I requested June 04, but that won't happen, since it is a Friday. They have those ceremonies every month. I think that is kinda cool. It will be done either in their offices in the waiting area or in the place where Jenny was sworn in. I hope it is in the last place, because the offices are very small and the "guests" have to be limited. I know there will be several who would like to witness my swearing in. Carl wants to be there to tell them what an ornery person I am - LOL

I now can breathe again, since that part is over. I am glad and thrilled.

My love, I can see you grinning from ear to ear that I did it. I had a picture of you in my hand the entire "testing" time. It sure helped. I know you were with me in spirit and I love you for it.

Steven and his fiancée found out that there is no baby. They will have some test done to see if everything is OK.

In the meantime I made friends with my sewing machine. I made a wheelchair / walker tote and donated it to Bev's humanitarian booth. After the fair is over, it will be send on to Volunteering Angels in Vegas. Took me a while to get started but now there is no stopping me.

Next week it will be 22 months that you are gone and I still miss you loads. I am catching myself many times thinking "Oh, I gotta show that to you" only to realize that you are not here.

Sweetheart, I love you so much and I miss you just as much.

Happy Anniversary

* * * my love. It's 8 years today. In celebration I had planned to trim your rose bush. It's not going to happen. Your bush is hiding under 6 - 7 " of snow. Well, I will do it after the snow is all gone.

I am sorry that I haven't posted in a while. A lot of things happened. I applied for my US citizenship. I could hear you shout "YES, SHE FINALLY DID IT" I had the finger printing done and received the invite for the "interview", which is on March 28. Bev in Logandale had her "interview" on January 11 and was sworn in on February 11. Exactly one month later. Sooo, I think that maybe my birthday present to myself will be the citizenship. We'll see.

Tony is testing me at random by shooting questions at me at any time. I have him stumped by not missing any - LOL I had problems with 2 questions at first. I wrote them on my board and now I am fine. They give you 100 questions to study, ask 10 and you have to know 6 - - it would be so much easier if they tell you which 10 questions they are asking. Don't you think so?

Ronnie Bryant (the gondolier at A taste of Italy) passed away last Monday. Funeral was on Saturday. I didn't realize that it was an open casket affair. I am sorry to say that I didn't last very long. I sat in the car and cried before I could drive off.

Last month Coach Sloan stepped down and Phil followed him. We were totally stunned, specially since he had just signed a one-year extension. Ty Corber is how head coach. I wish him all the luck. A couple of weeks after the coach left, D.Will was traded. Kinda makes you wonder if he wasn't at least partially responsible for the coach leaving, although it is denied. I think, we will never find out what went on.

On February 21 we went to the Energy Solution Center. I got cheap tickets for the Harlem Globe Trotters through KDYL the shopping show. You would have loved it. We were laughing so hard. Tis was the first time that I saw them live. I saw them on TV - but it is not the same. They are a riot.

Steven (in Edmonton) is engaged to a really nice girl. I will be a grandma. Hmmm - another grandchild I don't see. I will knit something for the baby and send it. They want to be surprised as to the gender - so I will make it neutral - LOL

My love, I promise to write a bit more often. But then again, we talk every night.

I love you so very much and I still miss you like crazy even so it is now more than 21 months that you left. Only and already 21 months.

Rest in peace Mom

It's been over a month since I posted last.

Several things have happened. Mom's health got worse and they (meaning my Ex and the doctor) decided to put her in hospice care. I think, that was a good decision. I called her every week and it got harder and harder. Many times she didn't know who I was. The same thing happened to my brother when he called her from the UK.

Mom passed away this morning. I've been expecting it but it is still a shock when I got the call. She will be cremated and her ashes with be strewn over the Alster (a lake) in Hamburg. She didn't want a funeral or memorial service.

I didn't go to Toronto to see her one last time. Sweetheart do you remember how she was when we saw her the last time in 2006? That's the way I am keeping her in my memory. She wouldn't have known if I was there anyway. I know I couldn't have handled it seeing her this way, not after having you pass away in my arms. I am a fairly strong woman - but I know my limits. Going would have been for the family (my Ex and Jason) not for Mom. Steven is in Edmonton and was hoping to see her Christmas. She passed away sooner than expected.

Just like with you I am taking comfort in the knowledge that she is now free and her suffering is over. That doesn't make it any easier on us. But it certainly easier on her and you. I like to ask you one thing though - could you please keep the noise down? Thank you. I know you had a party when you arrived.

My love, it is now 17 months since you traded in your dis-functional body. I still miss you lots and lots. Love you sweetheart - we talk soon.

OUCH

I am a little behind in posting. Funny thing happened: The first SS arrived after about 1 week, but the death benefit didn't. I called and was told - "Sorry, it got stuck at the payment center" - no problem. I was promised that it would go out the following week. It didn't. I received a letter telling me that they are keeping the benefit against the overpayment and are calling it good. I objected, because I figure they had 7 years to collect. If they insist, I will give in - but until then????

Sweetheart, do you remember the group "Mercy Me? NO? - How about the song "I can only imagine" - Thought that might ring a bell. Anyway, they were at the state fair on September 17. The tickets were not outrages so we went. It was very loud and the "last song" they did was "I can only imagine" - and the waterworks started. They got a standing ovation and did about 3 more songs. We enjoyed it. With your sensitive hearing, you wouldn't have I am sorry to say.

This past Monday I went to WinCo to do some shopping. I slipped on a grape and found out that the floor is hard, very hard. It took me about 10 - 15 minutes to be able to get up. They got me an electric wheelchair to be able to move. I never thought, I would use something like that. They took an accident report. When I got off the wheelchair to get into the car, I was feeling quite confident that I could walk without help - NOT. After about 3 - 4 steps, I was down again. Almost caused Tony a heart attack. Once home, he cancelled school for the evening to stay home and be there for me. I objected - but was told "Deal with it" - Yesterday I walked around with your walker. I am happy that I had kept it. After Tony got home I tried his cane, having him close by in case I need ed help. It worked very well. I am not about to try to walk without it though. I am very careful. I am taking it easy and doing some light exercises.

I will sit outside a bit later - it is wonderful out there. Your rosebush is now spouting 11 blooms in various stages. I am hoping to take a picture later.

I love you Sweetheart and I miss you so very much.

It's done

It's done, my love. I filed for SS. They will deposit the death benefit in a few days and I will receive my first regular payment in a few weeks. She was very nice, which helped.

She informed me that there was a overpayment for Michael. That was 7 years ago. Remember they didn't recall the April payment (?). We let it sit in the account for a long time waiting for them to retrieve it. They didn't. She told me that they will contact me in about 3+ month and I can make payment arrangements. What puzzles me is this - it was 7 years ago and all this time YOU received SS - why didn't they contact YOU? But that is not here or there - they want their money back. And they will get it - not a problem. We will celebrate receiving the first payment by going to Q4U - one of our favorite BBQ places.

Tony is taking his promise to you (to help me) very serious. I don't think, I could have made it through the last few years without his help and support. Guess what - he is starting school on Monday. Massage Therapist. We always said that he is good at it. He is looking forward to it. I am happy for him.

Monday this week we went to Wendover, Montego Bay (I had a free room) We got there early, like we always do. We were told to come back at 3 o'clock since the room wasn't done. Well, check-in time is 3PM. Not a problem. We checked back at 3 and the room was still not done. At 330 still not done. I was getting really mad. At 4 o'clock the room was finally done. Once we got to the room, I checked the rules they have posted on the door. Yep, check-in time is 3 PM. After talking to the manager I was informed that since I requested a room close to the elevator, those were the last rooms to be done. I could have had a room in the new section (about 1 mile away) When we checked out, they received a not very nice report. It is unacceptable to make us wait for a whole hour.

On a nicer note - I took all the money back home with me and Tony almost doubled the money he brought - LOL. We have already started saving coins and 1-Dollar bills for the next time.

Your rosebush is growing very nice. The roses are a bit bigger and they are starting to be peach. This confirms my theory that the bush is still settling.

My love, filing for SS was another little piece of closure. It is a long process. I am still talking to you every night, telling you about my day. It's not like you don't know about it anyway. But I miss talking to you. I miss you so much in every aspect. But I also know, that you are now with Jesus and without pain, the wheelchair and oxygen. The knowledge of that makes it easier for me to deal with all this.

I love you sweetheart.